illest-karma:

manualminds:

Carly Rae Jepsen - Call Me Maybe

Jasper says this song reminds her of me. :3
So now I ain’t it to her every time we hear it. :)

Hey, I just met you, And this is crazy, But here’s my number, So call me, maybe? It’s hard to look right, At you baby, But here’s my number, So call me, maybe?

colinfirth:

Matilda was left alone. That was how she liked it.

#forever pissed off that a five year old can make better pancakes than me

I

(Source: thelostie, via illest-karma)

Surrender

Can I just wave my white flag and surrender because I just cant handle the pain of loneliness anymore…I’m surrounded by couples. My roommate constantly has his girlfriend over and I’ll go to Rose’s house to get away, but her husband is back now. I’m not saying I’m mad for him being back, because I am glad he is safe and back in California. I am just sick of not being a couple. I’m sick of not going bed next to someone, waking up next to someone, getting cute texts throughout my day, taking care of someone…I just miss all of it. And I want it so bad. And I know that when your not expecting it, it will come, but I just don’t have the patience anymore. Everyone else has a somewhat complete life, so what is so wrong with me that I can’t experience it? Even if it’s just someone to date. Just someone….

I am tired of feeling like no one cares…

Husband #12— Evan Ross

So everyone knows Evan Ross from ALT…but personally I love his character in According to Greta…He is super sweet and adorable in it. He’s loving and caring, any girl would love to be with him.  He was also in 90210.

He is soooo freaking sexy =] 

he has some sexy ass eyes…and such a nice body =] plus in According to Greta, he has this southern drawl type of thing goin on…it makes me drool.

husband # 11— Ryan Gosling

Ryan Gosling is pretty freaking sexy. 

I was first obsessed with him in The Notebook. He is so cuteeee. I loved him in Mickey Mouse Club and he was interested in Drive. 

Husband #10—Michael Ealy

Michael Ealy…

He is one sexy ass man!!! He is in Think Like a Man and I absolutely loved the character that he played.  The announcement of loving his girlfriend was absolutely the cutest scene in the movie. 

even with fur on his face he is cute… =]

definitely a baby daddy =]

totally obsessed with instagram!!! =]

My rant!

My little rant of the day:

Why do guys need to lie?
Is it really necessary?

I am very much single. I do not like it, but the thought of getting back into a relationship is kinda a scary thought (due to past experiences). Because of this dating has become my new best friend. HOWEVER, what I hate more then anything is when guys lie.
Don’t tell me you are going to call me when you get home if your not, don’t tell me you are going to call me in the morning when your not, don’t tell me you are going to come over after work when you are not, dont act like you are into me and then disappear…like really? Is that really necessary. I don’t think people realize how frustrating that is!!

I know somewhere out there is someone that is meant to be with me, who will treat me how I wanted to be treated, and appreciate everything I have to offer. Can’t wait til he comes into my life…because dating is really starting to suck lol.

AHHHHHHHHHHH

That is all! =]

hahaha i always loved grampa!!

(via imancrosson)

Why Jewish Daughters Need Therapy

• Jewish Mother: “Hello?”
• Daughter: “Hi Mom. Can I leave the kids with you tonight?”
• Jewish Mother: “You’re going out?”
• Daughter: “Yes.”
• Jewish Mother: “With whom?”
• Daughter: “With a friend”
• Jewish Mother: “I don’t know why you left your husband. He is such a good man.”
• Daughter: “I didn’t leave him. He left me! ”
• Jewish Mother: “You let him leave you, and now you go out with anybodies and nobodies.”
• Daughter: “I do not go out with anybody.Can I bring over the kids? ”
• Jewish Mother: “I never left you to go out with anybody except your father.”
• Daughter: “There are lots of things that you did, and I don’t.”
• Jewish Mother: “What are you hinting at? ”
• Daughter: “Nothing, I just want to know if I can bring the kids over tonight.”
• Jewish Mother: “You’re going to stay the night with him? What will your husband say if he finds out?”
• Daughter: “My EX husband. I don’t think he would be bothered. From the day he left me, he probably never slept alone!”
• Jewish Mother: “So you’re going to sleep over at this loser’s place?”
• Daughter: “He’s not a loser.”
• Jewish Mother: “A man who goes out with a divorced woman with children is a loser and a parasite.”
• Daughter: “I don’t want to argue. Should I bring over the kids or not? ”
• Jewish Mother: “Poor children with such a mother.”
• Daughter: “Such a what?”
• Jewish Mother: “With no stability. No wonder your husband left you.”
• Daughter: “ENOUGH!!! ”
• Jewish Mother: “Don’t scream at me. You probably scream at this loser too! ”
• Daughter: “Now you’re worried about the loser? ”
• Jewish Mother: “Ah, so you see he’s a loser. I spotted him immediately.”
• Daughter: “Goodbye, mother.”
• Jewish Mother: “Wait! Don’t hang up! When are you bringing them over?
• Daughter: “I’m not bringing them over! I’m not going out!”
• Jewish Mother: “If you never go out, how do expect to meet anyone?

really starting to hate being single…i liked it for a couple days, but now im over it

Husband #9: Usher!!!

First of all that body of his…I could eat off his abs. Secondly, Trading Places, a single of his from like 2008 that I just now discovered, is the epitome of baby making music. 

“You get on top tonight I’m on the bottom 

Cause we trading places 
When I cant take no more, tell me you ain’t stopping 
Cause we trading places 
Now put it on me baby till I say Oooo weee 
And tell me to shut up before the neighbors hear me 
This is how it feels when you do it like me 
We trading places 
Gon get it, get it get it, get it get it, 
Gon get it, get it get it, get it get it, 
Gon get it, get it get it, get it get it, 

We trading places ”

can you say orgasm!!! 

HUSBANDS 7 AND 8:

Trey Songz and J. Cole.  

Trey Songz is a given. He is the master of baby making music.  Making Love Faces can give any girl an orgasm…I’m just saying.

J. Cole reminds me of my ex, which is probably why I am so obsessed with him.  The song Turn out the Lights or whatever its called is one of my favorite songs.

(Source: melanilynn)

Resuming the husband list starting NOW!!